It’s been a hard day today. If you’ve been following my posts on Facebook or on my garden blog about Lily, the hummingbird who built a nest in our backyard, you know what I mean. If not, here’s
So I’m pulling out an easy card and am suggesting that we do a five senses poem, like we did on Kick the Poetry Can’ts #1
The word I’m choosing for this one is GOODBYE.
As always, I start with a list. What does goodbye sound like? Taste like? Smell like? Feel like? Look like? Here’s my brainstorm.
sounds like the closing of a door, silence
the moment of a hold after a note is played
tastes like peanut butter stuck to the roof of your mouth
something that makes you want to rinse your mouth out
like mud
smells like something burning
something that makes you want to hold your nose
garbage when the bag breaks
feels like you’re riding up in the elevator and the cord breaks
drowning
you can’t catch your breath
looks like gray mist covering anything that was beautiful
ashes
a shut door, a closed gate, the blinds being lowered
an empty place at the table
And here’s my first draft of a poem.
Goodbye sounds like
the last note of the trumpet frozen
in time
in my mind
silence shuts the door
on what use to be.
It fills my mouth with mud
stuck to the roof of my mouth
grit between my teeth
I can’t floss it away
I can’t rinse it out it
sits
settles
festers
stinky smells slither
up through my nostrils
down to my toes
out of my pores
goodbye explodes like a busted bag of garbage
covering me until I feel like I’m drowning
can’t catch my breath
can’t face that empty place
can’t believe
after all this time
goodbye wins again
ashes, ashes
we all fall down
–Susan Taylor Brown, all rights reserved
Your turn. Try your hand at a five senses poem around the word “goodbye.”
ANGER
Anger looks like a thunderstorm
As black as a gloomy night
With thunder and lightning
Fighting for supremacy
Anger feels like an enormous rock
Deep down in the pit of the stomach
That cannot be demolished
Waiting, needing to be set free
Anger sounds like a V8 super car race
explosive screeching on the track
All competing, desperately seeking
That elusive spot on the podium
Anger smells like rotten potatoes
The pungent smell lingers forever
A most unforgettable experience
The odour just won’t disperse
Anger tastes like sour ball lollies
Just begging to be eaten, then alas
The taste hits you like nothing else
Until you can endure no more bitterness
Anger is no ones friend and everyone’s enemy
– Anne McKenna
I’d say you captured anger perfectly here, Anne. Another well-written poem. You’ve writing a lot this month. You should be proud of yourself.