I must have gone to the front yard a dozen times today and wandered around the plants, looking for inspiration. No luck. Then I told myself to just pick a plant, any plant, and write about it. That didn’t work either. So I went back into the house, ate some tortilla chips and wished for something sweet to counter the salt.
When Cassie wanted to go out back, I went with her and watched her chase butterfly that landed in the Ray Hartman Ceanothus. And the first line came right up and settled in my mouth, filled with alliteration and imagery, two of my favorite elements and ones I am trying to learn how to use better. The second line was easy….I wrote what I saw. The final line is what needs work. It says what I want to say but it’s just blah….and it needs a punch line that says something on two layers. And I think that’s something that just needs time for pondering.
So here is what I wrote yesterday, or rather the evolution of it.
Whenever I see a Ceanothus in full bloom, the Ray Hartman, I always think of those purple popsicles we used to get when I was a kid, the twin pops that you had to break in half and share with someone else. So the first line came to me right away.
purple popsicles
Ceanothus is 4 syllables so I knew I needed to use it on the middle line or I would have no words left for anything else so first draft was
ceanothus in full bloom
And because the bees were buzzing around it like crazy I ended with this.
summer sweets for bees
So my first draft was:
purple popsicles
ceanothus in full bloom
summer sweets for bees
But it didn’t feel very good to me.
So I brainstormed middle lines
ceanothus blooms for sale
ceanothus blooms don’t melt
ceanothus opens shop
ceanothus sweet shop
ceanothus ice cream shop
Even though ceanothus ice cream shop doesn’t make a lot of sense I like the sound of it.
purple popsicles
ceanothus ice cream shop
summer sweets for bees
I wasn’t pleased with the ending because it’s not summer yet and they don’t bloom in the summer time.
More brainstorming.
summer sweets for bees
springtime feast for bees
springtime sweets for bees
bees line up to feast
And this is what I ended up with.
Ceanothus
purple popsicles
ceanothus ice cream shop
bees line up to feast
@copyright Susan Taylor Brown 2009
April 1, 2009
Nice. You told yourself you were going to do it, and you did. I think that’s MORE than half the battle!
Yep. And I’ve decided to post what I wrote so you can go back to this entry and read it if you want.
O, I can’t wait to read how your process changes as the month goes on…
Thanks, Liz. I’ve decided to go ahead and post them because it is a great way for me to workshop and show others how you don’t have to be afraid to share the not-so-great stuff. LOL
I’ve edited this entry with the poem/more process so you can go back to this entry and read it if you want.